Summer can't come soon enough...

Trying out her new swimsuit in the tub.

With the talk of winter storms all over the place, I'm ready to skip spring and bring on summer! 

This is the time of year when winter needs to take a backseat to warmer weather.  Not being a winter weather person ever, I never really have a desire for one more snowstorm.  Anyone who knows me well, knows that at the slightest chance of snow I tend to hide in the closet and hibernate, so when March rolls around I'm ready to see the sun.  No more flakes, drifts or flurries just heat and plenty of warm days.  Unfortunately, living where we do, during this time of the year you can see three seasons within the course of a few hours, sometimes even minutes.  I know that living in the desert as we do, every little bit of moisture is needed, but not always enjoyed by all.

Yesterday, with a trip to the local indoor pool around the corner, we headed out for new swimsuits for the girls.  It made me wish I were loading up on sunscreen too.  Hopefully in the near future we'll be making our annual trek to Phoenix to visit the Grandparents and the SUN! 

Summer, Summer wherefore art thou Summer!  WE LOVE YOU here!  Come soon!

Making Lemonade

When life gives you lemons...

The last time I posted we had just moved to our new home in Santa Fe.  A lot has happened in the three weeks since we arrived.  Most of it has been positive and exciting.  We are mostly unpacked and settling in to the new house. We've begun to meet a few of our neighbors.  We had our first church service in our home.  The kids are getting adjusted to their new surroundings. We all are enjoying where we live and the many different opportunities that it brings for our family.

Here come the lemons...A little over a week ago on Saturday the 23rd, Jamie got a call that his mom had fallen.  To make a long story short, she had spent two days in her house without being able to get help, without any water, and without being able to take important medicine that she needs on a daily basis.  This left her severely dehydrated and in need of critical care.  It also caused her to have a major stroke which has affected her memory as well as her vision.  She was/is in pretty bad shape.  The doctors believe that she will recover much of what she has lost but it is going to take time. 

In the meantime, she has been moved to a rehab facility here in Santa Fe.  It has given us the opportunity to be able to minister to her in her time of greatest need. We have all been able to spend a little time with her.  Jamie has been visiting with her for several hours a day.  Sometimes he takes our oldest daughter with him.  She has shown such maturity and grace to her Gram.  It has been a beautiful picture to me about how God gives us chances to make an impact right where we are.  Unfortunately we can not be there all the time.  It is not a place that is condusive to hanging out for hours on end.  Speaking with her for many hours at a time is difficult for everyone.  She asks many of the same questions over and over within a few minutes time. Many times she can't recall that someone was even there to see her.   But, she is making improvements.  She is working very hard to gain what has been lost.  It is very tiring for her so she also needs a lot of rest.

Lemonade
Today, we recieved a phone call from a friend who gave us the idea to make a scrapbook for her to use to help her with her memory.  It was a great idea.  We quickly whipped together a binder with some page protectors and printed some photos. The kids added some personal touches.  It isn't anything fancy but it came together easily.  Our oldest daughter and I took it to her and hopefully it will make some difference in her ability to recall details. We added some blank pieces of paper for others to write notes to her that will help her recall their visit.  Maybe some of her therapists will be able to use it to help her remember important details about her life.  I believe that she has a long and difficult road ahead of her.  It is our job as her family to walk that road with her and help her however we can. 

This would not be the way that I would have chosen to begin this new journey here in Santa Fe.  But, God has a plan that is better than our own.  "For I know the plans I have for you, declares the LORD, plans to prosper you and not to harm you, plans to give you a hope and a future." -Jeremiah 29:11.  He will walk with us as we move forward in this journey and He will be glorified. 

We know that the days ahead will be difficult.  There will be many decisions to make regarding what will be best for Jamie's mom.  She will need a lot of patience and care. We are going to do our best to make lemonade out of the lemons we have been given.  Sometimes life's lemons turn out some fantastic experiences along the way.  Certainly we will learn a lot about ourselves in the process. 

Sometimes I fail to remember this group of verses that are brought to my attention and many times convict my heart. "Rejoice in the Lord always. I will say it again: Rejoice! Let your gentleness be evident to all. The Lord is near. Do not be anxious about anything, but in everything, by prayer and petition, with thanksgiving, present your requests to God, And the peace of God, which transcends all understanding, will guard your hearts and your minds in Christ Jesus." - Philippians 4: 4-7 What an awesome promise!

I know that many people are dealing with one type of lemon or another in their lives today.  Whether it be physical, financial, relational or spiritual in nature, any trial has the potential to either tear us apart or draw us closer to one another.   May the lemons in your life bring you closer to those who are important to you and most importantly to the God who promises to give you a hope and a future. 

By all means, make lemonade!

THERE is now HERE

We're HERE!  After the many months of planning and waiting with anticipation, the Duke family has finally arrived in Santa Fe.

It was not a simple task.  A little over a week ago we found a place to rent.  We spent last week packing and preparing for our move, along with some great friends who came to help me pack up my kitchen and basement.  On Friday Jamie picked up the moving van.  On Saturday, our home was invaded by the most loving people you have ever met.  I lost count of how many amazing friends, some that we don't even know very well, transcended on our house and loaded it all to the curb.  Many of them filled their own truck beds, trunks and back seats and joined us on the hour long trek to the new house.  They unloaded our furniture and boxes and enjoyed touring around the new house.  They made beds and arranged furniture and placed dishes on shelves.  They made pizza and enjoyed eating it with us.  They hung clothes and put toys away.  They held sick kids so I could put things away. And when they left I missed them terribly.  But, we weren't able to bring everything on Saturday...so Sunday afternoon, they packed up the rest of our possessions and headed here once more to unload and unpack and visit and help.  We have the most incredible friends.  Two of them even cleaned the old house, from top to bottom yesterday, so that I didn't have to.  That is love and I feel very loved by them all. 

Sadly, the majority of my family (everyone except me) has been sick for much of our moving experience.  The littlest one ran a fever for several days before finally starting to feel like herself, thanks to some potent antibiotics.  I'm so thankful that we had all the help that we did, because I'm not sure we could have done it all without them.  In fact, I know we couldn't.  It would have taken weeks instead of a few short days.

We are beginning to settle in. After only a few days, things are coming together.  We are still looking for some items that have yet to appear.  The garage is a warehouse from floor to ceiling with boxes and tools and who knows what, but it is beginning to feel like home here.  We have a beautiful view out our front windows and I've made a few meals in our wonderful kitchen.  I think we're going to make some fantastic memories here.

Tomorrow we will visit the old house for the last time, find any lost treasures and bring the odds and ends that have been left behind.  I'm looking forward to making new memories here in this beautiful home  we are renting in Santa Fe, but I have to admit, leaving the house that has held my sweet family for the past eleven years was much harder than I thought it would be. Two of my three kids were born while we lived there.  We've had many friends stay over and held family gatherings there.  There were too many birthday parties and barbeques on the deck to count them all.   On Friday we will sign the papers and pass over the keys and say goodbye to the first house we've ever owned, and with it close the chapter on a part of our lives that has been an incredible blessing in so many ways.   

So, here we are.  A whole new chapter begins.  It's going to be a page turner.  I can't wait!

Here and There

The Long Goodbye
For several months we have been calling our life the "the long goodbye" because for about the last year we have been trying to transition between living here to moving there.  Several years ago now, we started telling people we are close to, that someday we would be moving on from here to plant a church.  Someday is now here and we are still living in the midst of that transition.  I expect that the reality of the situation won't really hit until we've actually been there for awhile.  Of course we do have to get there first. 

House Update:
We are almost completely done with the sale of our house!  A buyer emerged toward the middle of December.  We had an offer just before Christmas.  We countered the offer and he accepted it.  He had the inspection done on December 27th and has been having a variety of people come make estimates on repairs the first few weeks of this month.  We went into the formal contract phase this week. Barring any unforeseen complications, we should be closing on our house here on February 15th.  Unfortunately, because this is a difficult market, we are not going to be making enough on the house here to be able to put a downpayment on something there.  We do feel fortunate to be able to walk away without being completely upsidedown, but I have to say it is a bit of a disappointment.

Bad News/Good News
The bad news is, we are having a difficult time finding something affordable to rent in the area that we feel called to work.  There are many factors as we move there that we feel need to fall into place and they just haven't yet.  That news could be worse if there weren't good news to go along with it.  The good news is that we don't have to be out of our house on February 15th if we don't have another place to live yet.  The buyer doesn't need to live here until the summer and will be extending us an occupancy agreement should we need it.  The trouble is, we are more than ready to be there and not here, so we would love not to need it.

"Who goes there?"
Some very exciting news is that we've already begun to minister in south Santa Fe (there).  We have been holding church services for the past few weeks at our friends' home there and it has been very encouraging.  Building new relationships there has only made it more evident to us how much we need to be there to do all that we are called to do.  While we are so thankful for the many incredible relationships we have built here, it is time for us to move forward. 

"I Don't Know"
These are the words that I find myself saying far too often these days.  I know that I am tired of saying them so I can't even fathom how tired my kids are to hear them.  "When are we moving there?" "I don't know."  "Where are we going to live there?"  "I don't know."  It is hard for me so I know it is much more difficult for them.  The great news is that I know who does know and I can trust Him.  He has a plan for us there, and I need to remind myself everyday when I'm feeling discouraged that His ways are higher than my ways.  Some days aren't as hard as others. Thank goodness!

Limbo Continues
So, do we pack like we are moving there next week or do we relax and enjoy the remainder of our time here?  It is a hard balance.  I've been working on packing things we don't use everyday but I don't want to live in a carboard jungle for too long.  I've been trying to plan sleepovers, play dates  and get togethers with special friends (both mine and theirs) so that this transition is fun too.  I'm hoping when it is all said and done, we will get to have all these memories stored up for the times when it isn't so easy there, because I know there will be days when we really miss it here. It would be wrong not to feel that way about a place that we have called home for so long and for people that we have considered family here.

I think maybe this describes best  how we feel:
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=9m-kbBamg_U

Not Enough Words

There are just not enough words to describe how I feel about her.  Today is her day.  She would be turning 93.  I've found it difficult to bring myself to write this post because I want so much to honor her with it.  I don't want to be too wordy but simple and warm and welcoming.  That is who she was.  But, there are just things that I want to say about her, to give a picture of who she was to me.  And, I'm finding that there just aren't enough words to say all that I feel when I think of Grandma.

When I think of her I think of:

-Welcome. As a little kid I can remember driving for days to get to her house.  We would stop at different relatives' houses to sleep and visit, but the goal was to get to the farm.  Occasionally, we would go into town first which only prolonged our wait.  I am terrible about direction and to this day, couldn't find the place if I had to, but I could feel it inside me like butterflies.  We would round a corner and pass by some familiar houses, groves of trees or farm equipment and there it would be.  Waiting and looking just like last time.  It had the longest gravel driveway imaginable that crunched under the weight of the car.  I always wanted to jump out of the car and run the rest of the way, thinking I could somehow get there sooner, because the last few seconds were so hard.  There she would be to welcome us, smiling through her tears of joy. I could see her bite her lip to keep from crying, so much pride and excitement in her eyes.  Usually she was standing by the side patio with open arms, the long driveway giving away our surprise. But if she was inside she would come dashing out and be there before we could step out of the car.   It was a race to get to her first.  She would lick her lips after every person and give each one the sloppiest wet kiss right on the lips.  Yes, it was a little gross, but it was from Grandma and her welcome wouldn't be the same without it.

- Bacon! I'm not joking!  I can't smell, hear the sizzle, or eat bacon without thinking of her.  I can see her pulling each smooth piece off the uncooked, thickly sliced pile and transferring it to the iron skillet that sizzled with joy as it received each new piece.  The smell of her kitchen at breakfast rousing even the hardest sleeper to come and enjoy the morning on the farm.  Wishing me a good morning with a squeeze that no one can imitate, she wouldn't lose a beat in her morning routine.  Nothing could compare to the perfection of breakfast with Grandpa and Grandma and no day ever started out better than that.

-Special.  She had a way of making us feel special.  Whether by buying our favorite cereal or sending gum and balloons from her bank through the mail or letting us pick out a treat on a trip to the grocery store, simple acts to show that we were special to her.  I remember once that she asked what our favorite candy was and then brought the hugest bag of Jolly Ranchers to our house that I'd ever seen.  They were all cherry flavored and wherever she had been storing them left the funniest floral taste on them.  We ate them anyway...ALL of them, and I'm sure I had more than my fair share.  She always sent us a dollar for our birthdays and continued the tradition on to my own children.  I have a picture of each of them with the last dollar she ever sent a few years ago. 

-Fun Vocabulary.  She used cool words like yonder, folks, and kin.  They were awesome!  Really, what I wouldn't give to hear her tell me about someone I didn't know who lives "over yonder". 

-Laughter.  She had the best laugh.  I loved hearing her tell stories or talk fondly about family and friends.  She lit up the room with her laughter and joy.

-Kittens.  She liked cats.  Her favorite were the white ones.  She had a lifelike statue of a white cat with blue eyes in her living room.  It was the only kind she would let inside.  She did make an exception for us once when we found a very sick little kitten that we tried to nurse back to health.  It was black and white and she helped us feed it with a water dropper.  It spent the night in the entry room where the coffee pot was.  It survived the night but was gone before the next day.  I also remember finding a set of three butterscotch striped kittens that we played with and made into her pets whether she wanted them or not.  By the time we left at the end of the week, they were hers.

-Measurement.  She had the most fantastic way of showing you how big something was by holding out her left index finger and using her other hand to compare the length of it to.  I loved it when she did that.

-Chickens.  She had the best chicken coop ever.  It was musty and stinky and dark.  I was seriously scared to go in there but really I loved it.  Gathering eggs in there was such a treat.  I loved the sound of the rooster crowing in the morning.  It was so creepy and amazing to see Grandma wring the neck off one of the birds,  see it run around the yard without its head, watch her pluck all the feathers off it and chop and fry it up...nothing ever tasted better than freshly murdered fried chicken on Grandma's farm.

-Home Remedies.  Grandma used "Germ-trol"  (basically pinesol) as a cure-all.  If you had a cut or blister -germtrol, dog bite or knee scrape- germtrol, splinter from the barn...yep -germtrol.  Once I did get a sunburn and she prescribed (not germtrol) but vinegar and brown paper.  It worked.  So did the germtrol usually.  She also used fingernail polish on chigger bites. One time my sister had a wart and she took her to see a guy that gave her a quarter to buy her favorite candybar and then rub it on the wart after each bite.  I think that worked too.  I love home remedies because of her.

-Music.  She loved music.  She had a groovy organ and would play all kinds of hymns "by ear".  She could also play the harmonica, which I didn't know until I was much older and she played it at our house.  She was pretty good at it and the best part was that she had a blast doing it.  She loved to sing and be sung to.  My oldest daughter sang "Jesus Is All the World To Me" to her once when she was about four years old and you would have thought that it was the best gift she had ever received. 

-Fancy.  She loved to get dressed up and she put a lot of care into her appearance in a simple way.  She loved her clip on earrings, pretty pins and necklaces and wearing fingernail polish, usually her favorite color red.  Eventhough I am not a girly girl myself, I appreciated it about her. 

-Church.  She loved church.  This might be the area of life I have the most in common with her.  She felt at home at church and was there every time the doors were open.  She sang in the choir, she taught Bible studies, she organized people, and she directed Vacation Bible School for more than her fair share of years.  She was an amazing servant and didn't need the appreciation from people because she did it to please God and she loved doing it.  I have a lot to live up to.

-Wonder.  She knew how to be a life long learner. I don't think there was anything she wasn't willing to try. She was brave not foolish.  I loved that, well into her later years, she went bowling for the first time and kayaking and too many other things to name, and she had so much fun doing it.  She was excited about learning something new and had a child-like wonder that many never experience once they are grown.  I loved that about her.

-Love.  She knew how to love better than anyone I know.  She knew how to put other people first.  She loved babies, children, and elderly people. She loved her friends and cared for them well.  She was always doing something kind for someone else.  She wrote me letters and told me how proud she was of me.  She loved her family.  She loved my husband.  She loved my children.  She loved me.

-Memorable.  Everyone knew her and she knew them all too.  If you went anywhere with her she was constantly saying hello to someone she knew.  She had a story about anyone you could ask her about.  Even until her last days, she could tell you details about things and people that no one else remembered.  She was respected and loved by many.  Even the people who cared for her during her last days thought so highly of her.

-Faith.  She was a faithful follower of Christ.  I know that when she got to meet Him face to face He embraced her as His friend and bride.  I know that she passed away on the eve of the day that we celebrate His birth so that there will be a constant reminder that they were linked for life. That her death is an extension of the life she lived that pointed others to Him.  When she gave her life to Christ as a young person, she took it seriously and lived an honorable life that must have pleased Him to no end. 

-Prayer. She knew how to pray.  She prayed for people she knew and didn't know.  She prayed for her friends and her family.  I know that she prayed for me.  I think I will miss that most of all.

My Grandma Short was amazing.  She had more grace, and joy and devotion than anyone I have ever known.  She will forever be someone I look up to and admire and will strive to emulate in many ways.  I am thankful to have known her and will miss her for the rest of my days.  I look forward to seeing her again someday in heaven.  I'm sure she will greet me well and laugh with joy when we see each other again.

https://www.facebook.com/photo.php?v=547030551993310

Thankful for...

Little Man's Mayflower diagram

It's that time of year once again to be thankful...as if we shouldn't be thankful each and every day.  I'm so glad that in America, there is a day set aside to give thanks and show gratitude for the full lives that we get to live here on earth.  Jesus said in John 10:10b, "I have come that they may have life, and have it to the full."  I often wonder about people who do not believe that there is a God; who are they thankful to?  It is hard to say thanks without having someone to tell it to.  I know that it is possible to be thankful for what you have and glad that you exist but who/what do you show gratitude to, if not to God?

This time of year is bitter sweet for our family.  We have so much to be thankful for but there are also some sad times attached to the fall for us.  Many of the special people in our life have passed away during the fall so it is difficult to remember the happy times without also shedding a few tears of loss.  My husband has had many losses on his side of the family including his own dad four years ago.  He passed away the day after Thanksgiving in 2008 and is very missed by his wife, sons, daughters-in-law, and grandchildren...three that he had the opportunity to enjoy, one that he never had the privilege to meet, and one on the way.  We are thankful, of course, for the time that we did get to spend with him but wish that it could have been longer.  All the holidays were more entertaining with "Pop" around.   There is definitely a void there that can't be filled, eventhough we enjoy being together in his absence.  He did help make life very full.



Proud Grandpa
 

I have mentioned in several other posts that I am blessed beyond measure.  I do have so many things to be thankful for during one of my favorite times of the year.  Here are my top ten. 
*My God, who provides all that I could ever need
*A husband and best friend who loves, honors, protects and provides for our family
*My three amazing kids
*My extended family
*Wonderful friends both near and far
*My health and the health of my family
*A warm and happy home
*Always having enough
*Laughter
*Love

Shout for joy to the LORD, all the earth.  Worship the LORD with gladness; come before him with joyful songs.  Know that the LORD is God.  It is he who made us, and we are his;  we are his people, the sheep of his pasture.  Enter his gates with thanksgiving and his courts with praise; give thanks to him and praise his name.  For the LORD is good and his love endures forever; his faithfulness continues through all generations.  -Psalms 100

Waiting is Hard

Because of the the LORD's great love we are not consumed, for his compassions never fail.  They are new every morning; great is your faithfulness.  I say to myself, "The LORD is my portion; therefore I will wait for him."  The LORD is good to those whose hope is in him, to the one who seeks him; it is good to wait quietly for the salvation of the LORD.      -Lamentations 3: 22-26

IN CASE YOU HADN'T HEARD
I have been thinking a lot about patience and faith lately.  Our family is in the middle of a very big transition in our lives.  After thirteen years of service here, in about six weeks, Jamie will no longer be working for First Baptist Church of Los Alamos.  At the beginning of January, we will officially be church planters.  Our "plan" is to move to Santa Fe as soon as our home sells and begin a new chapter in our ministry and in our family.  We continue to press forward with this plan and wait with anticipation for all that God is going to do in and through us there.  What an exciting time!  However, it still feels a little surreal.  There is no place like limboland.

LIFE GOES ON
One thing that is keeping me from really feeling like it is going to happen, is that our life here just goes on normally as we continue with all our usual activities.  The kids continue to participate in choir, sports, AWANA, and spend time with friends.  We've been talking about this next step for a loooooonnnnng time but it has yet to become a reality, so we live life as usual.  We are all just waiting for the new, the unknown, to come into our lives.  Waiting for a new life to begin is difficult and strange. 

WHO, WHAT, WHEN, WHERE?
I  like to plan things out.  This is something that has been a huge test for me during this time.  There is nothing for me to plan.  Sure, I can plan what to put in the next box that I pack but I don't know what anything is going to be like when I unpack it.  I don't know where I am going to live or who my neighbors will be.  I don't really know what our lives are going to look like at all.  I don't even know when we will be hitting the road.  My best bet right now, is to take one day as it comes.  I'm working on resting in the fact that God knows my future so I don't really need to know until I need to know.  In the meantime, I will make dinner tonight,  we will see family for Thanksgiving, we will decorate for Christmas...while waiting for the next who, what, when and where.

FOR SALE
The biggest challenge so far has been waiting for our home to sell.  Keeping our house clean and ready to show is equally difficult!  For anyone who has ever been in this position with young children, I know that you know what I mean.  Unfortunately, the market is very slow.  Our home has been on it for about four months and we've only had a handful of showings.  I will be very glad to have the selling of our house behind us.  I will miss this house but I will be thrilled for it to belong to someone else.  While I wait, I have a safe, warm and comfortable place to sleep at night and for that I am very grateful.

NOT CONSUMED
I am reminded of another time when these verses first became a gift to me at another time of waiting and watching for God to work in my life.  More than nine years ago,  we were hoping and trying for a second child.  We waited a long time.  I finally became pregnant in July of 2003.  We were ecstatic to find out that we would be welcoming another baby into our family in April of the following year.  Unfortunately, I lost that child.  Within a few weeks of having great joy, I entered a time of devastating sorrow.  It was probably the hardest testing of my faith that I have ever endured.  Through searching for comfort, God directed me to this passage of scripture.  Waiting was hard.  But, I survived that wait and our son was born in September of 2004.  God kept his promise and I was not consumed. 

WORTH THE WAIT
Going through difficult times like that one have helped remind me of God's faithfulness.  While this time of waiting does not compare to the very sad time that I went through several years ago, waiting is still hard.  I know that God has a plan, it may not look like the one I keep trying to form in my mind.  It may be very different than what I would like to happen.  But, I know that He will continue to be my portion.  I can trust that His word is true.  He will provide all our needs.  I will wait for Him and I know it will be worth the wait.